Give Me a Reason
by E R Barkley
Summary: Set in the time after Mass Effect 3. James Vega and Commander Zeera Shepard had their lovely one night stand, but what happens when their feelings for each other grow stronger after the war with the reapers? Rated M for language and later chapters. Updates on Wednesdays.
1. Chapter 1

Well, I've had this idea for awhile and its been eating at my brain and making it hard to write for When Dawn Comes, thus, I'm getting the first chapter of this up tonight and I've put a chapter posting scheduled up on my profile so that all my lovely readers can see what day I will be posting for what story. Anyways, this story is set AFTER ME3 so really, it's just kinda my own little thing because I was one of those crazy girls who wanted a Jame romance and the Citadel DLC gave me a reason to do this.

Disclaimer: Bioware owns, I just like playing with their things.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

It was supposed to be simple; a one night stand and no attachment. Zeera could easily agree with that. It wasn't like it was the first time she'd had a one night stand or anything like that. They'd woken up the next morning and made jokes about everything, kidding around like it was nothing, just a bout of blowing off steam as Garrus would have put it, but it had slowly become more as their fight with the reapers had become more serious, but as those final hours drew closer, fear gripped her warrior's heart and she stood there, tall and proud with cerulean eyes filled with fear and doubt. She was alone as she had always been, staring out the window of the Starboard Observation. Just a matter of moments before their final battle would begin and she wanted to be alone, because she could not be with the one who was slowly crawling under her skin. Lifting a hand, she thumped her fist against the glass between her and the stars. Nothing would be the same now and she ground her teeth in frustration, before turning away, long chocolate hued locks swishing behind her as she strode out of the room and off to face her fate, a fate that could mean death if she was not absolutely positive that they were ready for this.

* * *

She was a drift in darkness, but it was so loud, she could hear people yelling, feel the touch of skin on hers and it was painful, yet she couldn't say a word, couldn't even see any light to help her find them. Zeera internally screamed, wanting them to stop and then an electric pulse went through her and she was gasping for breath and the world was a blur around her and the words of others seemed far away and muffled, like they were calling to her while she was under water and then the world was black once more and she couldn't feel the pain, instead she drifted in a dark world where fleeting memories passed by at a rapid pace until it came to that last one, that last drunken night of romance that had led to something she wished she could cherish.

It felt like ages had passed and then a warm feel spread over her and heavy lids opened, only to close once more as the harsh rays of the sun seeped through a broken window, flooding her room with light and she lifted a hand to cover her eyes, feeling the sharp pull of wires and an IV as she did so. Where in the blazing hell was she?

Taking care, she sat up and looked around, sharp blue eyes darting around to try and find anything that might be remotely familiar, but she couldn't find anything. Panic filled her and she moved to stand, but a soft voice stopped her.

"Whoa, Lola, stay down." Her eyes sought out the owner of that voice and her throat closed up as she looked at him, battle worn as he was.

She opened her mouth as though to speak, but stopped, raising a hand to her throat when pain laced through her. Calloused fingers came into contact with smooth bandages and once more, panic filled her. What had happened? She couldn't remember much, except that she destroyed the reapers and she had the full knowledge in her head that she should be dead right now, but she was damn near positive that she was still alive and kicking because it hurt too much for her to in the realm of the dead and everything seemed much too real for that matter.

"Don't push yourself." His voice calls to her again and Zeera shots him a sharp look, bright eyes locking with dark ones.

"I. . . Always push. . . Myself, Vega." It took effort to get the words out and the big man in front of her just shook his head before picking up a cup and filling it with water from a pitcher near the door that she hadn't noticed until he'd moved.

Narrowed eyes watched him, calculating what he might do, but she didn't really need to do that. James Vega walked towards her with the cup, offering it to her and with shaky hands, she took it from him and sipped at it lightly before speaking once more, "So, James, shouldn't you, I don't know, fetch the doctor? I'm sure no one is expecting me to be awake." She rolled her eyes, shaking her head and feeling the long strands of her hair dance against any bare skin.

"I think I can wait to do that, after all, I'm sure you don't want to be surrounded by doctors and nurses, not after just waking up." There was teasing to his tone, but it was a genuine sign that he understood her none the less.

"How kind of you." She cooed, voice oozing with fake sugary sweetness and only a hint or two of flirting before she sat back against her pillows and slowly drank down the rest of her water.

For the moment, they sat in silence, but she knew it wouldn't last. He probably had a lot of questions and she certainly had a lot of her own. She would wait though, wait and let him decide when it was time to speak, because that was all she could do, even if she was plotting her every answer in her head at this very moment.

Zeera sat there, tracing her fingers in an idle pattern over the fabric of her blankets, thinking those thoughts when he did decide to speak, "Look at me please, Zeera." His voice was soft and her cerulean eyes snapped up to his face, narrowing harshly at the use of her first name.

"I don't have the answers to your questions, if that's why you want me to look at you." She practically snarled the words as him, on the defensive, knowing that someone was going to try and pry things out of her that she wasn't even sure of.

"That's not why I want you to look at me. Zee, I was worried about you. I thought," His voice broke and he paused, clasping his hands tightly between his parted knees, eyes locked on the ground before he could look up at her again, "I thought you were dead."

For a moment, her world stopped spinning and she just stared at him blankly, eyes wide and confused and then they cast downward, locking onto a loose thread on her blankets before she answered him. "I thought I was dead too," Her words were barely a whisper and then she was looking at him again, "But I'm not and those damned reapers are or at least, I hope they are."

James shook his head and chuckled at the venom in her words before nodding, "Yeah, those sons' of bitches are dead. I'd ask how you did it, but I don't need those answers right now, I'm just glad to see you alive, awake and talking." There was a sad tilt to his smile before he rose from his seat, giving her a salute before he walked to the door, "I'll go fetch Chakwas for you." And with that, he was gone and Zeera was left staring after him, words left unsaid.

* * *

Laying in bed hours later, all she could really be happy for was the mostly clean bill of health she'd been given. Aside from a fantastical amount of new scars and a permanent limp that would eventually fade to something not so obvious, she was good to go. This was her last night here and then she'd be free to wonder back onto the Normandy, which had only arrived back on Earth the other day. She'd been out for a month, a whole month of nothing, but blackness and healing from injuries that had nearly killed her. She rolled onto her side and stared out the window, watching the stars which seemed so very far away and wishing that this had never happened and that for once, she wasn't completely alone.


	2. Chapter 2

Songs: Try - Pink, Mirrors - Justin Timberlake, Life Without - Stanfour, Just Give Me a Reason - Pink

Disclaimer: Bioware owns, I just like playing with their toys.

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She stared in the mirror, bright eyes taking in her once familiar face. There was a scar from her left temple all the way down to the edge of her jaw on the right. Zeera reached up a hand, running callused fingers over the rough edges of the healing wound and winced before dropping her hand and setting her jaw, frustration at her own weakness blooming hot and heavy in her heart. Giving her head a firm shake, she swiftly tied her hair up in a messy bun and turned around, looking over her shoulder at the multitude of scars there. Somewhere old, from battles long passed, but most of them were new, raw and angry looking. She'd given up so much of herself for this cause and yes, everyone now saw her as some sort of hero, but it had all come at such a high price because they'd all been too prideful and naive to listen to her when she'd first voice her concerns.

Taking a deep breath, she shrugged off those thoughts and looked down at her leg. It was brutal. Mutilated with healing wounds and scars, her right leg would never be the same again. At least she was still able to walk, some weren't as lucky as she was, but still. It was a lot to take in. Zeera leaned back against the sink and stared up at the harsh, overhead lights; cerulean eyes closed tight and wished that things could have been different.

However, that wasn't possible and she pushed off, standing tall before she limped from the bathroom and into her hospital room and over to the neatly laid out pile of clean clothes waiting for her. She reached down and unfolded each piece before pulling them on painstakingly slow. Zeera was sure she could have called someone for help, but pride made her stare at that t-shirt and jeans and try to form a plan in her head on how the hell she was going to get them on. Making a frustrated noise, she lifted up jeans and stared at them. There was no way she could do this alone. Her leg wouldn't bend right; it would be just her luck that she would rip open the wound.

"Need help?" The overly sweet voice could only belong to one person and Zeera was quick to turn her head towards the Asari and stick her tongue out.

"Maybe." She said, wrinkling her nose in distaste at having to ask someone else for help.

Liara simply laughed at her before gesturing for the Commander to sit on the bed. It took all of about ten minutes for them to shimmy her jeans on, only for the fact that Zeera wasn't very good at letting other people help her out; after all she'd lived her whole life taking care of herself.

Zeera laid there, arms over her head and let out a huffing breath, "Well that was a pain in my ass adventure." Liara sat down beside her, laughing softly, "So did you just come by to make sure I was alive or is there another reason?"

"Just making sure my friend was still alive and hadn't managed to get herself killed and to let her know that the Normandy is waiting for her, whenever she's ready to return to it," the Asari reached out and patted Zeera's shoulder, cause cerulean eyes to meet ocean ones and she smiled, a cheeky grin that said she hadn't exactly tried to stay out of trouble, but that she had managed to behave herself somewhat.

* * *

They talked for a few hours, about mindless things with no real meaning. Liara didn't ask Zeera about what happened before the Reapers died and she didn't expect her to. They were just two friends conversing about their dreams and things that had happened while Zeera was, in a manner of speaking, dead to the world.

Carefree laughter filled the room as the two women talked and it took them a moment to realize someone was watching them. As was typical of Zeera, she noticed first and her gaze landed on Javik, who was smiling in this mildly amused way at the two of them.

"Aw! It's my favorite Prothean!" Javik laughed and shook his head, moving towards them.

"I'm the only Prothean you know." He commented, causing her to wave her hand at him dismissively.

"Details, details. In all reality, I knew many other Protheans, we just called them Collectors and most of the time they were trying to kill me. Well, all of the time really." He snorted at her then, a rude noise that made her raise an eyebrow at him before he leaned against the wall and joined in their conversation.

* * *

It had been so long since she'd last laughed like this. It felt good to be with friends, free of worries and laughing to her heart's content and when Javik and Liara left, hand in hand, she knew they had an adventure ahead of them and that it was sure to be beautiful.

Still, her heart ached. Yes, she was happy for them, but she didn't have that sort of joy. The man who inspired it had been a one night stand and that was it, nothing more, nothing less, he did not want her for more. She let out a sigh as she took one last look around the room that had been her shelter for so long.

Slinging her bag of meager belonging over her shoulder, she turned and started down the hallway. Zeera was off in her own little world, when she ran into something solid.

"Whoa there." She didn't recognize the voice, but her eyes shot up to look at a man with mousey brown hair and a smile on his face. Zeera narrowed a look at him and took a step back.

"Sorry about. . ." She was cut off by the sound of a woman yelling.

"Milque!" Zeera turned her starting eyes towards the Asari who was heading there way and paled when she saw who held her hand and ran with her. At first, he didn't see her and then his eyes met hers and he released the Asari's hand and came to a stop.

"Commander." James spoke and saluted her, causing the Asari and the man, who she'd come to figure was Milque, to turn and look at her.

"At ease, Vega," She folded her hands behind her back, standing tall and looking as commanderly as she could possibly look, "Who are your friends?" She put on a fake, charming smile, trying not to be judgmental as she waited for him to answer her.

James turned to gestured first to the Asari, "This is Treeya," and then to the man she'd run into, "And this is Milque." He gave no further answer and she was sure it was because he was deeply uncomfortable, but she could have been wrong, though she was positive she wasn't, after all, Commander Zeera Artemis Shepard was never wrong.

"It's a pleasure to meet the both of you." She offered one of her hands; the other remained firmly on her bag. Both of them shook her pre-offered hand, before she tucked it back behind her, "But I should be going. Joker is expecting me back on the Normandy and I have things to do once I get there." She smiled politely at each of them, but the warm of it did not reach her frigid eyes, "I'll see you around, Vega." With that, she walked away as quickly as she possibly could and didn't look back, she couldn't bring herself to see them all together, especially not if Treeya was holding his hand again.


	3. Chapter 3

This chapter was interesting, to say the least, at least for me anyways. This chapter, like the chapter of my other story is late only because my laptop seems to like to lose things. Regular Friday updates for this story and regular Tuesday updates for When Dawn Comes will start again next week.

Song: Better than I know myself - Adam Lambert

Disclaimer: Bioware owns, I'm just playing with all their toys, like usual.

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**Chapter 3**

That had to be the most awkward thing she'd ever done. Sure, Zeera wasn't usually an awkward turtle when it came to social encounters, but that had been someone she had feelings for and an asari he seemed to be attached to. The Normandy, that's what she needed. She needed her favorite pilot and his crude sense of humor and just to be home. Taking a deep breath, she moved out of the hospital and came to an abrupt halt, wide cerulean blue eyes taking in the destruction around her.

Buildings crumpled and the bodies of humans and reapers alike still littered the ground, crews moving about trying to clean up as much as possible before night fall came. She swallowed harshly, closing her eyes. She'd tried so damn hard to save everyone and still it wasn't enough. She would always be a hero in the eyes of others, but in truth? She wasn't a hero, no matter how many lives she had saved, there were so many that had been cruelly ended.

Swallowing down the over whelming emotions, she took a determined step forward and almost regretted it as she was swarmed by several reports that had been lying in wait for her. Taking a step back, bright eyes widened, unsure of how she felt about this. Her mind was racing and then it came to a sudden halt and setting her bag on the ground, she folded her hands behind her back and stood as tall as her injured leg would allow her to, the mask of the Commander firmly in place as she looked at each reported, all of them speaking at once, trying to get her to talk to them. Lifting a hand, they fell silent and she blew out a slow breath. "I will not be answering any questions today." Her voice was firm and it caused them to start yelling, demanding answer and she just ignored them, instead picking up her bag and pushing past them. She just wanted to go home and see her friends and sleep. Today had been stressful enough without the insanity of reporters.

Moving as quickly as she possibly could, she managed by some miracle to find her way to the dry dock of the Normandy. Trying to remain calm, she walked slowly and with dignity towards the air lock before stepping inside and peeking around the corner to see Joker in his seat. A sly grin curled her lips and she quietly set her bag on the ground, before inching towards him, lower lip between her teeth and fingers reaching idly towards his hat.

Joker seemed to be completely absorbed with whatever he was doing and had no idea that she was here and her smile grew more and more wicked until her fingers gripped the top and she pulled it right off his head and placed it a top her own. Joker spun his chair around, cursing and spewing before coming to a stop and staring at her with surprise written all over his face before a buoyant grin spread across his features and he opened his arms wide. "Zeera!" There was pure joy in that one word and she was quick to move forward and gently hug him.

"I've missed you. Life was so boring. Why didn't you come see me?" A pout formed on her lips, wide eyes looking at him with mock hurt. Truthfully, Zeera knew why he hadn't come to visit. He hadn't really been able to and she could tell from the look on his face that she was full of shit and thus, he just snorted at her, pulled his hat off her head and turned back around. "It's good to be home." She smirked, not saying anything about the absence of EDI having already been informed by Liara of what had happened and knowing full well that it would only upset Joker before she started walking away only to pause when she heard him speaking once more.

"It's good to have you back, Commander. The world would have been worse off if you weren't here to help us get back on our feet." She smiled at his words and chuckled softly before walking away, limping gait taking her towards the elevator.

* * *

Home. She was home. Lying on the bed in her cabin she looked up at the skylight, eyes half shut and a dreamy smile on her face. It had been so long since she had been here, in this bed filled with memories of girl talk, card games and shenanigans. She'd missed it so much. Zeera saw this as her baby, like Grunt, only bigger and it couldn't hug her back when it saw her, but that was okay, it was still her place where she could find peace even in the darkest of times, hell, the people she considered her family where here and that was all that mattered.

As she lay there, her mind wondered. What else was going on out in the great wide world? She'd saw those reports hadn't have the usual tech with, all they'd had on hand seemed to be pen and paper, so old school Zeera hadn't even been sure if it was still around, but they must have gotten it from somewhere, not that she had any idea. This was all too much. She'd just gotten out of the hospital and her mind was already running around trying to figure things out that it and really? Those answers were far and few since she wasn't even sure who to ask in the first place. There was no use wasting time dwelling on things that would only serve to give her a headache, thus rose from her bed and began putting thing away, slowly and methodically until there was nothing left.

Zeera stood there, cerulean eyes taking it all in, landing on all the things she treasured most, like her old N7 helmet, the Prothean orb and several other things. Her lips curled in a smile as she walked up the steps and peered in at Sir Squeaks in his cage, happily munching away at the food someone had given him, before wondering into the bathroom, craving a hot shower like her life depended on it.

The water was heaven as it rushed over aching muscles. She'd gotten into this habit of taking two showers a day because if she didn't the pain of over worked and newly healed muscles would make it nearly impossible for her to sleep and thus, she stood under the spray, hands braced for the moment and enjoyed it as the steam billowed around her, but it was not to last and soon, she was shutting off the water and taking deep breaths as she moved around, drying off as quickly and carefully as she could so as not to snag any still healing scars before wondering back out and just standing there, taking it all in for the first time in what felt like ages.


	4. Chapter 4

It's on time! Yay!

Songs: Breathe - Taylor Swift, Beautiful Mess - Diamond Rio, The Scientist - Coldplay

Disclaimer: Bioware owns, I'm just playing with their stuff, like usual.

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**Chapter 4**

Deciding that find out who was on her ship, she dressed and headed down to the crew deck and a rather delighted look colored her features as she saw Tali and Garrus, sitting side by side talking. A wicked grinned crossed her lips and silently as she could manage with her limp, she moved towards them and stopped, wiggling like a cat ready to pounce before she skipped forward and wrapped her arms around their necks. "My loves!" She squealed in delight.

Both aliens looked up at her, surprised and delighted all at once. "Shepard!" Garrus was the first to speak, shifting his chair back, causing Zeera to take a few steps back so he could stand. He turned and gently pulled her into an embrace and she grinned, patting his shoulder as they stepped apart only to be pulled into a hug with Tali. It felt like ages had passed since she'd seen the two of them.

They sat, talking about times gone by, laughing at inside jokes that no one else would understand and just enjoying each other's company. However, this peace wasn't to last as the elevator came to a halt and out walked Kaidan Alenko. Zeera peered at him over her shoulder as he came around the bend and smiled, waving her fingers at him in greeting or she'd started to until she'd seen who all was with him.

What the hell was that damned asari doing on her ship? Her hand dropped and she turned back around, biting the inside of her cheek to keep from making some snarky, smart assed comment to her. She pulled her hair over one shoulder, fiddling with the ends as she watched Kaidan lead Treeya into Liara's room. While she had the chance, she rose from her seat, patting Tali and Garrus on a shoulder before she walked away, moving towards the elevator to head down to the cargo bay. She needed to check things out around the rest of the ship and she just didn't want to get stuck talking to Treeya or Kaidan.

The first person she saw when she stepped off the elevator was Cortez and she let out a cry of excitement and rushed towards him. She'd never jumped on someone as hard as she'd jumped on him. "Steve! I thought you were dead! You wonderful man! I'm so happy to see you!" The large man staggered slightly under her weight. That was about the time she noticed his arm was in a sling and she quickly stepped back or at least tried to, put it seemed Steve was having none of that as he wrapped her in a one armed hug and grinned.

"It's good to have you back, Shepard." His voice was warm and made her glad to be back. Sitting on his work station, she talked to him for awhile, finding out what had happened since she'd been gone. A carefree laugh left her as she listened to him talk and they both seemed determined not to dwell on the bad things that had happened.

Leaning back on her hands, she yawned, long chocolate locks touching the counter top as she leaned back looking up at the ceiling of the cargo bay. Her day had been eventful and it was wearing on her. Jumping down from the counter top, she winced when the pressure on her still healing leg caused her mild pain. Gingerly, she lifted her leg and shook it out before placing her weight on it once more.

Just as she was moving towards the elevator the doors slide open and she was quick to duck behind some cargo and peek around. "Shit." Her eyes landed on James as he stepped out, thankfully alone. With a slowly released breath, she snuck as stealthily as she could, which wasn't as successful as she had hoped.

As was her luck, she tripped over one of the many wires on the ground, literally face planting on the ground. Steve, who happened to turn around at that moment, was doubled over laughing at the pout on her lips and the soft whining noise she was making. It didn't help her any though because James was quick to turn around and look at her, eyebrow raised.

"You saw nothing." She pointed at Steve as she tried to get up, but her still healing leg just wouldn't support her as she tried to get up and she let out a growl of frustration, followed swiftly by a hiss of anger when James tried to help her up, "I'm fine, Vega! I can get up on my own."

"Doesn't look that way, Lola, so just let me up you." Her eyes narrowed the brilliant blue turning nearly black as her lids lowered and she growled at him once more before reluctantly giving him her hand. Strong fingers wrapped around slim ones and with care, he pulled Zeera to her feet, causing them to stand nearly chest to chest. Keeping her face angled down, she looked up at him through dark lashes and chocolate locks. He looked good, better than she looked, she was sure, after all she'd seen herself in the mirror and what she'd seen there had horrified her. Well, maybe not horrified, but she was still shocked and unsure of what to think, after all, her looks had been her life, especially when she'd be on the streets. She took a step back from him and without another word, walked into the elevator in hopes of escaping him.

She should have known that was never going to work. He walked in right before the doors closed and stood in silence as the elevator headed towards her quarters. She really, really did not have the time or the energy for this. Refusing to look at him, she kept her body turned slightly away from him, eyes locked on the fair corner as though that might somehow keep him from talking to her. It was working for the moment and really, that was all that mattered, but as soon as she stepped off the elevator he followed her out and only made it as far as her cabin door before narrowed a look on him and stopped.

"What do you want?" She glared up at him, head tilted back and cerulean eyes shining with an inner anger she reserved for those who really pissed him off and all she got from him was a soft groan and then, his lips, soft and warm, but firm as steel pressed against hers and she nearly fell backwards, but then is arm wrapped around the small of her back, pulling her towards him. Zeera didn't want to surrender to his touch, didn't want to reach up and wrap her arms around his neck, but she did, pulling him closer to her and sighing, opening her mouth to him at the soft caress of his tongue against her lower lip.

James walked forward, causing her to stumble a step backwards before he pulled back, chuckling softly and she wanted to say something, ask him what he was doing, why he was doing it, but she couldn't bring herself to ruin this moment. They stood there, just breathing for a moment and the next thing she knew, he's carefully put one arm behind her back and the other under her legs, sweeping her off her feet and carrying her towards the bed.

Now her mind was racing now, but she couldn't seem to stop herself from pulling him down with her when he moved to place her on the bed. Once more lips melded together and she moaned against the taste of him, cradling his head with her hands as they laid back. Her blue eyes closed, but opened movements later when she felt the soft caress of his hand on her face. Zeera pulled away from him, turning her face away, but it seemed Vega was having none of that as he turned her head back to him and pressed a gentle kiss on the scar.

Zeera couldn't help, but ruin the moment now, she had to know. "Why, James? Before you wanted nothing to do with me after that one night stand and now? What's changed your mind? I thought. . . I thought you were with that Asari?"

A warm chuckle left him and he stroked gently down her face. "When I thought you might be dead, I lost it. I was so panicked I thought they would have to lock me up to keep me from hurting myself. As for Treeya, I used to have feelings for her, but then I met you and you blew everyone else out of the water."

She swore she had to be dreaming for him to say these things and she narrowed a look on him before taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, trying to think straight.


	5. Chapter 5

Well, it's been awhile. You people are getting an update today and an update Friday. Please, don't judge me to harshly on this er. . . scene. If you have any creative advice, please feel free to pm me, but otherwise, be nice.

Songs: We Weren't Crazy - Josh Gracin, Brass Bed - Josh Gracin, Can't Stop - Maroon 5

Disclaimer: I admit it, I don't own anything, but my insane ideas that are just how I wish things went in Bioware's stuff.

* * *

**Chapter 5**

"I don't know what to think right now." She said, bringing her hands up to cradle his face as she searched his dark eyes, looking for answers she wasn't sure she would find or understand.

James leaned down, pressing his forehead to hers, "Don't think, just do."

The low, sultry sound of his voice chased away all other thoughts and she reached up, arms looping around his neck as she curved upwards towards him, lips seeking his in a frenzy of motion.

How long had it been since she'd last felt this way? Sure, she'd been with him at the party, but that wasn't what she was thinking about. No, she was thinking of the last time she'd felt free and light. The last time she'd felt this was when she'd gotten into the N7 program, then again when she'd taken down Saren. She hadn't felt this way after taking down the Reapers, she'd been too hurt, too lost and in more pain than anyone could imagine. She was still in pain, but it was nothing compared to what she'd felt when she'd woken for that moment in the hospital, screaming her throat raw. Now she was free of all that, except for the still healing pain in her leg and other parts of herself, yet even all that was pushed from her mind as she wrapped herself around him, caving to his gentle touch.

Callused fingers stroked over the soft skin of her stomach and she closed her eyes, sighing against his lips, giving him the chance to kiss her more deeply, without all her controlling behavior that she typically gave to him, surrendering to the fact that she was Zeera and not the Commander. Her breathing came in a rush as he pulled away, lips traveling over the exposed skin of her neck, causing her to tip her head back, giving him more room to explore and she sighed as his fingers traveled further up her skin, tracing idle patterns upwards until his fingers brushed the underside of her breasts causing her breath to hitch.

Placing her hands over her head, she fisted them into the sheets as his fingers explored more and more of her, pushing her shirt up and over her head along with the sports bra she'd opted to wear in place of her usual more attractive under things and for a moment it bothered her, but al thoughts fled from her head when his fingers traveled lower and he undid the buttons and zipper of her pants, sucking in a breath, she chuckle, low and seductive before she leaned up on an elbow and used her other hand to reach behind his head and tug at the collar of his shirt. "I won't be the only one getting naked, Vega. Take it off." Her words were a lusty purr and he looked up at her a wicked grin on his face as he sat back and slowly stripped off the shirt, causing her to hum out her appreciation.

Sitting up swiftly, she stroked her slim fingers over his tawny skin. A wolfish grin curled her lips as she shifted onto her knees, lips caressing his chest, teasing, nipping, tongue darting out to sooth the sting. There was a power in knowing that she could make a man like James moan her name like a plea for something more, there was power in knowing he wouldn't force her to do something she didn't want to because he knew she could take him out in the blink of an eye. Yet, there was pure understanding between them as the last of their clothes fell away and they were bared to each other.

Cerulean eyes took him in, seeing the imperfections on his body and silently cursing him for making it seem as though they didn't bother him in the least even as she calculated all the scars that riddled her body and put her on edge, fear of the reaction he might have to seeing her like this.

Zeera could easily admit that she'd once thought herself to at least be pretty, but now? Covered in all these scars? She wasn't so sure what she thought of herself. Her blue eyes were still striking in their shade and her dark hair was still lush and soft, but other than that? She looked like a patchwork creature hastily put back together.

The pressure of his fingers was light against his sides, skating down over the skin slowly, reverently and those negative thoughts about her looks quickly flew out the window and she leaned forward, lips seeking his one more. This time, everything was so much slower, the kiss was filled with passion and longing, but it was as though they were savoring each other rather than hastily getting a taste of one another.

Her heart was racing as they moved backwards on the bed, her head coming to rest on the pillows and him hovering over her. For a moment, they just stared at each other, lips parted and breathing labored, but then they were both smiling and his weight came down on top of her. She relished the feeling as they touched and teased, hands moving over each other slowly, memorizing the things they hadn't in that first drunken meeting of bodies. His hands lingered on her sides, stomach and traced slowly down her back, eyes never leaving hers. Her own hands followed the motions of his, traveling over his body as slowly as his did over hers. Zeera could admit that it was achingly sweet the way he seemed to cherish her in this moment and no matter how much she wanted to be cherished, she wanted more.

Slim, lightly callused fingers skimmed down his stomach, following the faint line of his happy trail before they wrapped around his erection. She felt his whole body tense up before he groaned, looking towards the skylight for a moment before his eyes drifted back down to hers and he let out a string of Spanish that she didn't even pretend to try to understand and grinned up at him wolfishly. Her fingers stroked him, up and down, her lips parted and quirked in a slight grin as their eyes locked and stayed that way as her fingers worked magic on him.

Eventually, he leaned forward, resting his forehead on her shoulder as his breathing became labored and finally he jerked away from her. Gently he pushed her back and then, his hand was between her spread thighs and she shifted towards his hand, arching into him as the heel of his hand came to rest one of the most sensitive spots on her body. Her arms went around him and her nails dug into his skin, leaving red crescent marks when she lifted her hands to tangle her fingers in what she could of his hair. God, it felt like ages since anyone had touched her like this and in all reality, it had been. That was okay with her though because this was what she'd needed to feel alive again.

Just as she almost reached that edge, he stopped, removing his hand from her body and she let out a frustrated groan before it was replaced by a gasp and her cerulean eyes drifted shut and she bit her lip to keep from making more noise than she wanted to and she felt him lean down, lips pressed into her shoulder as they laid there for a moment, arms wrapped around each other, savoring the feeling of the other and then it became too much and she rolled her hips and he started moving.

Zeera could easily say that it wasn't even remotely close to perfect, this union of bodies. No, it started out mildly awkward, causing her to have to fight the urge to start laughing. However, they quickly caught each other's rhythm and it turned out to be a moment, she would probably never forget.


	6. Chapter 6

Well, this got postponed longer than I wanted. First off, I'm sorry it took so long. Second, I had to figure out what I wanted to do with this. And third, I had epic knee surgery and thought I was going to be better by this Wednesday, but it ended up being a lot more down time than I had expected. I apologize for not letting you all know in advance.

Songs: Like It's Her Birthday - Good Charlotte, Hurricane - Thirty Seconds To Mars

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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**Chapter 6**

Sunlight streamed through the skylight above, bathing the room in a rosy, early morning glow. Zeera stretched languidly, having slept peacefully for the first time in ages and then she became aware of a warm body next her and her head turned sharply to look at them before a slow grin curled her pale pink lips and she slowly sat up, using on arm as support to look down at him, dark locks falling around them to create a shield against the world as she leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead before she rose from the bed, arms over her head, fingers laced together and back arched. She let out a soft sigh when she felt it pop and dropped her arms down to her sides before passing a glance over him only to find James watching her.

"See something you like?" The words came out suddenly, dripping with sarcasm and taunt as she shifted to face him, cocking a hip and place a hand upon it. His eyes roved over every inch of her taking in the tattoo on her left thigh, the one tucked neatly along the curve of her right breast and known there were two others on her back, one kissing her shoulder and the other, lingering on the small of her back. Each one telling a story of the people she'd lost and the people she loved.

"Every time I look at you, I see something I like, Lola." He drawled and her lips curled as she rolled her eyes. Tossing tangled locks over her shoulder she moved away from the bed, feet treading lightly as she crouched down to pull out a pair of underwear, yoga shorts and an N7 t-shirt. Turning to face him, Zeera pulled on each article of clothing, cerulean eyes watching him closely before her view was obscured while pulling her shirt over her head. Shifting her arms up behind her head, she pulled her hair out and let it fall gently down to the middle of her back.

Turning away from him, she moved up the stairs carefully to her bathroom and grabbed her brush from the bathroom before moving back to lean against the fish tank at the top of the stairs. She ran the brush through her hair with quick efficiency, pulled it up into a messy bun on top of her head and then lobbed the brush at James. "Come on. Get up. I'm sure we have things to do today. Like get back into shape or train or fix things." Zeera turned away from him then, moving out the door with a wicked grin tilting her lips upward as she headed into the elevator, his laughter following after her.

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She'd been right about them having things for her to do. If anything it was just like old times only without armor and there was no need for lethal force, a shame in her opinion as she moved around, keeping things in order at the ration line, a pistol at her side and a rather bored expression coloring her features. She'd been cleared for LIGHT duty; whatever that meant and she hated it. She wasn't allowed to use her biotics and she was required to check in hourly with her supervisor to make sure that she was fine. In her opinion, she was just peachy fucking keen.

Her fingers drummed lightly against her thigh and she breathed a sigh as people of every species moved along slowly, heading into the building to get the rations for the week. Everything was going smoothly, the last few people had just entered the building when trouble hit.

Two batarians, armed and firing rounded a corner. Zeera moved on instinct, diving behind one of the solid gates, using it as cover before leaned around and firing back at them, teeth bared in rage. She'd never liked batarians and now they were stuck on HER planet and she had to deal with them. Most of the time, they were civil, but there were those rare few that thought they deserved more rations than any of the other people. It was easy to incapacitate them. Easy to take them down and put them under arrest, what was not easy was being sent home after that.

Fury boiled in her chest as she made her way back to the Normandy. Sure, she knew she was still recovering, but one fire fight that could barely be called that was nothing like what she'd usually been though. Hell, she'd still been healing from Cerberus' patch job and she was fighting mother fucking mechs, but the Alliance seemed inclined to see her as fragile, easily broken.

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No one was on board when she arrived, it was empty of people and she rolled her eyes in frustration before moving to the elevators and headed down to the rebuilt Shuttle Bay, knowing that the rest of the crew had rebuilt the gym area.

Stepping off the elevator, she moved over to the sparing simulator and prepared. She didn't stretch like she should have, didn't even give herself time to warm up. Zeera jumped right into the fight, fist flying and rage burning in the pit of her belly. She could feel her heart racing, picking up speed faster than normal, her breath becoming labored and she knew it was because she'd been out of the game of so long. Rather than easing up like most reasonable people would have, she just pushed herself harder.

Zeera didn't hear the voice over the com talking to her, didn't hear the sounds of worry in Joker's voice as he tried to pull her from her fit of rage. She didn't feel the pain lacing up her leg, didn't see the blood dripping down her leg, staining the ground as she moved. She knew this was a problem, her rage often did this, where she would just close out everything, but that one emotion and when she felt a strong hand come to rest on her shoulder, she swung around, landing a hard blow against their jaw with a snarled curse and flaming cerulean eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

I was informed that the last bit felt a bit rushed and I apologize for that. With my knee being in pain and having meds, I just wanted to get it up before I started physical therapy. I'm still in therapy so chapters will be off schedule, but hopefully no more than two weeks apart. We shall see. Anyways, forgive me for the delay and here is the chapter.

Disclaimer: Bioware owns, I just play with their stuff.

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**Chapter 7**

The instant her eyes landed on him, pain and regret flared. Shit. Kaidan stumbled back and clutched his jaw, fingers feeling over it as I stared at him, fists balled at my sides and chin thrust forward proudly. Zeera wasn't proud of herself for punching him, but at the same time, he'd been stupid enough to touch her when she was pissed without announcing himself. She was trying to keep her composure, but the more the silence gathered the more frustrated she got and she finally snapped.

"What did you think you were doing? Don't you know better than to just touch someone who is obviously pissed off? Are you losing your goddamn mind?" She snapped the words out at him, arms crossed over her chest and a ruthless mask coloring her features.

Kaidan looked at her and the look he gave her was one of utter confusion and that confused her. "Shepard, I did. I tried to get your attention. Joker's worried about you. Said you weren't responding to him, so he sent me down here to check it out. I can understand why he's worried about you." She rolled her eyes and moved to turn away, "Shepard!" She continued to ignore him and readied herself to start another round, "Zeera!" That got her attention and she snapped back around, baring her teeth like a wild animal, ready to lash out at him, "Zeera, stop! You're leg is bleeding." That gave her pause and she looked down, only to feel a small amount of panic rising.

"Fuck! The doctor's are going to make me go back if they find out." Zeera couldn't bring herself to crouch down and look at her leg. She wasn't sure she'd be able to get up if she did and she was fearful of being forced to lay idle once more. It wasn't in her nature to do such things and that's what would have happened if she didn't take care of this before Chakwas found out. Huge, cerulean blue eyes looked at Kaidan, begging him to help her and as she knew he would, he shook his head.

Letting out a sigh, he pinched the bridge of his nose, "I'm not going to lie for you, Shepard. That needs to be taken care of by a professional."

With that, she slumped to the floor, forehead resting against the knee of her good leg. "Fine. Go get the good doctor, but just know if I get put on bed rest or some other shit like that, you'll regret it." She looked up at him then, eyes filled with rage as he turned and walked away, heading for the elevator. Taking a deep breath, she flopped onto her back, staring up at the ceiling of the cargo bay. Eventually she closed her eyes, just trying to shut out the world.

Zeera wasn't sure how long she'd been laying there, but eventually, she heard the elevator open and her eyes followed suit, narrowing on the ceiling as she heard a pair of footsteps coming towards her. Tilting her head, she looked at the two figures coming her way and blinked, surprised. Kaidan hadn't brought Chakwas with him as she'd thought he would. No, it was, in a way, far worse. He'd brought James with him of all people. Shepard shifted her head back and closed her eyes once more, teeth grinding together in annoyance. James would surely scold her for her bad behavior.

Large, gentle hands touched her shoulder, but not a word was said. She couldn't look at him, knew he could see the blood on her leg, even as he gently scooped her up. It made her wonder, why Kaidan hadn't been the one to do this and her only answer was that maybe he wasn't foolish enough to touch her again; maybe he figured she would take him out.

Zeera refused to look at James as he and Kaidan took her to the elevator. They headed towards the crew deck, where Kaidan got off, further confusing Shepard as her and James traveled to her quarters. She got the district feeling that she was about to have a really, really horrible conversation about taking it easy and self-preservation. Her fist clutched tight against her belly and her eyes squeezed shut. She was starting to feel the pain in her leg, but she couldn't let it show, not while James was with her.

The doors opened and he walked over, jostling her slightly as he repositioned her in his arms and she bit the inside of her cheek, fighting back a yelp of pain as he walked into the room and carefully placed her on the bed. "Are you going to scold me now?" There was a sigh in her voice, almost like annoyance as she looked at him where he perched on the edge of her bed.

His gaze slide towards her and she regretted speaking. He wasn't just angry, he was fucking furious. She swallowed slowly, but held her ground, bright eyes holding amber-whiskey ones. "That was stupid, Lola. Really stupid. Do you want to be taken off of the duty rosters again?" There was a cool calm to his voice that made her feel worse about what she'd done and she looked away from him feeling shameful and foolish.

"It just wasn't my day." She said sharply, keeping her eyes locked on the empty wall, unwilling to look at him anymore. Zeera felt him rise from the bed and thought he was leaving her, but moments later, he returned, sitting by the side of her bed leg. His touch was gentle, but it was enough to make her flinch. The limb was sensitive and even the slightest touch caused pain.

James shook his head at her before pressing a damp cloth to her leg carefully; cleaning up what blood he could without actually touching the wound. A hiss of discomfort left her and she managed to wiggle into a sitting position, watching him carefully.

This was not what she had been expecting. She'd been expecting a long, hard talking to and then to be left alone, but that was not what she was getting. No, if anything Zeera was stunned, completely and utterly stunned by this gentle treatment and care. It was unlike her to allow it, but she was slightly unsurprised he was so caring, she just hadn't been expecting his care giving to be placed upon her. Reaching up a hand, she shoved back chocolate locks, eyes watching him closely, narrowing whenever he got too close to the jagged wound and baring gritted teeth when the pain really got to her. He still didn't say anything, even as he reached down and grabbed some bandages and spread some hard to come by medi-gel on the wound before wrapping it.

Shifting back on the bed, she rested her back against the wall and continued to watch him as he put everything away and then he moved to it up against the wall next to her, rubbing a hand over his face before speaking. "I know you get frustrated. Hell, I think most of us that were on your team are getting frustrated. They have most, if not all of us doing pointless jobs that could easily be handled by what's left of law enforcement, but no, they chose to stick all of us on those mediocre jobs so that our commander could have time to heal, if she'd give herself the chance to do so." He looked at her side long and for the first time in a long time, she actually blushed, a blush full of her shame.

"I get it. I'll take it easy for awhile, then maybe we can get off this hell hole, even for a little while. I hate Earth, I've always hated it." The last part was mumbled, but he still heard and he arm came up to wrap around her shoulders, causing her to lean into his side.

"I know you do, Lola and you have good reason to, even if I like some parts of it." He chuckled before trailing off into silence once more and for the moment, they just enjoyed the peace, because she was sure it wouldn't last more than a moment or two.


End file.
